Holiday Lights
by Suzotchka
Summary: Marcus organizes a holiday party
1. Chapter One: Observances

Disclaimer: I own nothing. JMS owns everything but the plot, which is mine.  
  
Author's note: This is the first fic I am archiving. Please read and review. Also due to exams it may be a while before I update.  
  
Holiday Light  
  
Chapter one: Observances.  
  
For the last few months, near a year to be exact, the wars for liberty had waged bitterly. It was the middle of December, but, unlike the previous two on the station, Christmas preparations weren't even thought of. In fact, no one had mentioned it. It was as if defeating the darkness was all that mattered, and nothing else registered in the minds of those who had become the Army of Light.  
  
**********  
  
Commander Susan Maria Ivanova stood in C and C directing supply ships to dock, launching fighters, gathering information and much more. A man silently watched her, unnoticed by her and her crew of workers, working hard for the fall of the Dark Ones. They were weary and silent, none of last year's batter. Susan, herself, looked exhausted. She had a dry cough, which was heard often, despite her efforts to muffle it with a handkerchief. She was pale with shadows under her eyes. Her always slight frame looked skeletal. Her hands were blistered and she seemed to be having trouble with her back. Unobserved he slipped away.  
  
Security seemed just as silent as C n C. Chief Michael Garibaldi paced the main office observing the cameras, searching. His people practiced hand to hand and searched for Clark's people and agents as well as the usual criminals. The Chief seemed older than his 43 years. His face was aged, his hair gone. There was a bitterness in his eyes. The bitterness made the man, although a warrior himself, slip away.  
  
Medlabs were full of the casualties of the last battle just three days ago. Unlike the other places of silence, it was filled with noise of doctors battling to save lives. They, too, were weary. Dr. Stephen Franklin's eyes were bracketed by lines. He slipped by his desk and discreetly opening a drawer, took out a needle of stims to jerk him back to life.  
  
The only of the bunch who were in their own quarters that night, were the Sheridans', John and Delenn, expecting their first child in a month. It seemed they were the only ones who had been spared the physical scars of battle. Yet, their worry showed as well. The worry of doom, of darkness and of fate worse than death for the universe if they failed.  
  
The man was one of them. A freedom fighter. Second in command of the stations Rangers. For many years his pain had forced him to ignore the holidays. Now, he had a reason to live and a reason to die. Now, he had a purpose. He had a reason to celebrate. The darkness would be defeated. He would help his comrades see that as well. They deserved a break. And they would have it. 


	2. Chapter Two: Invitations

Disclaimer: See chapter one  
  
Holiday Lights  
  
Chapter 2: Invitations  
  
The War Room was the same as always, yet not. At five of the six places lay a card, sealed and headed. In the sixth seat sat Anla'shak Marcus Cole, watching the others file in. John and Delenn had come together. Michael was next with Susan and Stephen behind him. Mike lacked his usual arrogance, and didn't swing his legs on to the table. Nor did Susan sit on it. Instead they all sank into the chairs and waited to begin.  
  
Noticing the invitations they each took them, without opening them, probably intending to do so at the end. That was fine Marcus decided, his eyes settling as usual on Susan, noticing every detail as the meeting began.  
  
"There hasn't been an attack in 3 days," said Sheridan, opening the briefing. It went on for hours. The attack they were planning to take place in 5 days at the edge of Vorlon space where they believed the Shadows would try to attack. There were so many details. It was near midnight when they closed the meeting. "Anything else?" asked John as a way of a closer.  
  
"Actually Captain, yes. If you would all open your envelopes," Marcus answered. Puzzled they all complied. They all looked up after reading their invitations, which went as followed: 'You are invited to a holiday get together on December 24th, at my quarters, 6 PM.'  
  
John and Delenn accepted immediately. Stephen and Susan also accepted hesitantly. Michael, thoughtful, nodded as well, unenthusiastically. Marcus grinned delighted, ignoring the reluctance. He couldn't wait to make this happen.  
  
As everyone filed out, Marcus called Susan back. Ignoring Michael's stare of protectiveness toward her, he asked, "Susan, join me for dinner?"  
  
"I can't," she said. "I have to get down to Maintenance."  
  
"It's 11:30, please. I need to talk to you about something."  
  
Against her better judgment she said, "All right, let me get changed," as she headed to her quarters.  
  
Ecstatic, Marcus responded, "I'll pick you up in half an hour."  
  
Susan didn't respond, all ready out the door. 


	3. Chapter Three: Memories and Mistletoe

Disclaimer: see chapter one  
  
  
  
Holiday lights  
  
Chapter 3 : Memories and Mistletoe   
  
Half an hour later, to the second, Susan's bell rang causing her to smile despite herself. Marcus was nice and sweet and definitely too innocent for her she told herself sternly. She was Russian. She didn't deserve any long lasting joy she thought going over her statistics. Standing, she called for entry. Marcus walked in chatty as usual, stopping speechless as he took a look at her. She wore a green leotard with black jazz pants. She wore black heels with her matching cloak that she wore with her freedom fighters uniform. As usual, it held her Ranger pin given to her by Entilzah Sinclair. Her hair was loosely bound, and she held a black purse. As she walked over the cloak flew, displaying her Ranger's belt with her Mineera's emblem and pike, Marcus watched silently as she led him out.   
  
They walked silently through the halls. The crew, who had given up most pretense of a holiday season, had not forgotten their tradition when it came to public decorations. Every year on Babylon 5, decorations went up everywhere, from C n C to the crews mess, the day after Thanksgiving and remained there till January 7th. Marcus wanting to start a conversation, inquired about them. A strange smile came over her as she said dreamily," It was 2257, we were trying to work out holiday schedules, but even with Michael, Jeff and me working it was impossible to let everyone who wanted the Thanksgiving and the day after off free. That Friday, the one after Thanksgiving was hell. People on duty were depressed. Crew moral was at an all time low. All of a sudden Michael rushed onto C n C with boxes of Christmas decorations, singing carols and sucking on candy canes. At any rate his excitement was contagious. Soon the entire station was decorated. Last year everyone expected it. This year we did it just for tradition I guess. " Pausing she said," I must be boring you."   
  
"Not at all." said Marcus hurriedly, terrified she would stop. She had never opened up to him or anyone in front of him. She was the reserved type. He was so excited because she was opening up without hesitation.   
  
"What was it you wanted to ask me?" she said bringing them back to the topic of discussion.   
  
"Well, I know you are Jewish and since this is going to be a Holiday party I was hoping you would help me with some of the traditions and such." Marcus waited her reply with eagerness knowing that this would cause them to spend a lot of time together.   
  
"Sure...eh, OK." Susan replied hesitantly "Great." interrupted Marcus not wanting to give her a chance to change her mind." Tell me about Hanukkah with your family."   
  
Her face was overcome with sorrow, as she thought of her family, all of them dead now. Her voice was unusually husky with emotion. "For days before Hanukkah my mother would be ordering cleaning, decorating , cooking . I remember that the servants would do everything except make latkas and Pecan rolls, and sew my dresses. That Mama always did. Papa and Ganya would have their clothes tailored, but she and I would have matching dresses for each day of Hanukah. She always made the latkas by herself. I remember that my aunts and cousins would shoo their kids away, but she always included me. Our dresses were Russian style, I remember when I was six I used to parade around in it all day with my father snapping pictures. We would light the Menorah, sing , hold services lead by Uncle Yossel, and play games. Until the last few years I always just lit a Menorah and prayed. The last two years Jeff always came with Michael. This year I am all alone, I mean we used to have winter holidays on the low and John knows about my traditions and even participated but he is busy with the baby coming. Michael is tied up completely in Security; I haven't even asked him."   
  
They were at a stand and ordered hot chocolate and biscuits. Marcus looked at her softly, reached out to sweep a strand of hair from her face, and said, "We will spend every possible minute in preparations and make latkas and rolls which rival those of your Mama's. As for Russian dresses, if you wear one I would be honored to take pictures of such a beautiful woman." She blushed somehow knowing he loved her, knowing she loved him. Knowing they were soulmates.   
  
Marcus suddenly looked up and pointed at the mistletoe that hung above them. He leaned in and kissed her firmly yet gently on the lips. He looked into her eyes and said softly, " I love you Susan."   
  
She looked into his eyes, intending to protest, yet finding she could only tell the truth as she said. " I know I love you too Marcus, " as they leaned in again to kiss. 


	4. Chapter Four: Pros and Cons

Disclaimer: See chapter one  
  
  
  
Holiday lights  
  
Chapter 4: Pros and Cons She pulled back afraid. He lifted her chin and looking into her eyes said, "We can make this work." She nodded and whispered, "I just need some time." His eyes were serious and said, "I will wait for eternity." Her eyes searched his, and she nodded silently, getting up and leaving behind the happiest man in the universe with a silly grin pasted on his face. Susan paced her quarters not knowing what to do. They were in the middle of the war, she thought, they didn't have time for this. But John and Delenn had made it work, and they were happier than ever. She couldn't do this. Since Nathan she hadn't been with anyone. Never with anyone she felt so strongly about. She couldn't let her emotions rule her. Yet, for the first time since her mother's suicide when she was just ten, they overwhelmed her. For 17 years now she had lived in a shell. Now she didn't know what to do. She yawned deeply, looked at the time piece. Seeing it was 0300, she decided to go to bed. She had to be up in two hours for training with the pilots she was teaching. She would deal with this then. Marcus sat in his quarters in his own world of bliss. He knew this wouldn't be easy. There was the war, and, of course, Susan's own fear of allowing someone close to her since the death of her family in various circumstances. Susan never talked about them. In fact, she rarely talked about anything not work related, let alone herself. However, Marcus had, with the help of some Ranger techniques, hacked into her file, knowing she was the one the second he looked into her eyes. There was the chance that she would reject him. But he could not let that happen. He was not sure he could survive if he did. 


	5. Chapter Five: Good Mood

Disclaimer: Same as always. Nothing is mine but the plot  
  
Author's note: Thanks for the reviews. I was very afraid that no one would like this, but due to the encouragement I am continuing. Please Read and Review, both good and bad.  
  
Also in my world, everything happened earlier, but the war ends at the same time. On their cloaks they wear Ranger pins standing for them being freedom fighters, from Sinclair. This is set at the end of 2259 and will go into 2260. In my time line they already have their uniforms (from Delenn's rebirthing ceremony). I am including Ranger belts and pikes as well in their uniforms. Finally, Mineera is the word I have chosen to be the Mimbari term for ' Lady of light.' Merroon is the masculine form. The seven men and women of light are Sinclair (addressed as Entilzah), John, Susan, Michael, Stephen, Delenn, and Marcus. They are equally respected and obeyed by the Rangers. However, as in the show, Entilzah handles most of their affairs.  
  
Thanks. Any questions just mention in reviews, and I will be more than happy to answer. Once again please read and review. OK, on with the story  
  
  
  
  
  
Holiday lights  
  
Chapter 5 good mood   
  
(The next day.) The atmosphere in C n C was much lighter the next day due mostly to the Commander's good mood. Waking up that morning, Susan felt much fresher than she normally did when she only had two or fewer hours of sleep (which was too frequently these days, and she went through hell trying to hide it). Today she felt as though she had slept for nearly ten hours instead of two. Marcus loved her, and she loved him. Love. It made her feel like a teenager instead of a battle weary warrior. At 27 she was much wiser than her years, and it showed in her hardened eyes. That day they still showed the knowledge they held but the pain in them had lessened. She had woken as usual and rushed through a shower. For the first time in a long time she sat down at her dressing table after dressing and drying her hair, wanting to look nice. She painted her nails bright red with instant dry nail polish. Her nails were curved, not too long and not too short. But she didn't pay much attention to them, just some strengthener every now and then. Now, she saw she had pretty hands. She looked at her face. She wasn't too bad looking, she realized. She touched her lips with bright red lipstick, shades bolder than her usual maroon. She was about to put her hair up in its customary tight braid but stopped and took out a black jeweled clip with which she lightly pinned her hair up, so it flowed over her shoulders like chocolate brown silk. Finally she sprayed on a tiny bit of perfume, grabbed her briefcase, and hurried town to Maintenance 16, where she met with her pilot students every day. The pilots she trained were ten nobodies from Maintenance, who over the last few years she had turned into pilots. They had been training since the summer of 57, two and a half years ago. She had come aboard just four months before, in early February. For the first time since the friendships she had had with John when she left the Io at the end of 55 and the one with Nat before that she had friends. Sure she had acquaintances. But friends had to be pursued. And then they had to be trusted. Her friendships with them had existed only due to the fact that they had sought her company and done their best to prove their trustworthiness. So since her brothers death she had buried herself in her work. When there was a problem, she fixed it. Now she had Jeff and Michael. Jeff had been surprised at first at how much she did, but soon accepted it as part of her. However, both he and Mike had a tendency to worry too much. So when she heard about the workers, she didn't tell them, knowing they wouldn't approve of her strategy. Late one night she had walked into a Downbelow bar notorious for crimes that made it unsafe for women especially. She had opted to wear civilian dress appropriate for the location. She walked towards the men, ten extremely large males around Michael's age. They were close to 350 pounds each and nearly all were over 6'5". The ten dangerous-looking men were heavily drunk. She had been receiving reports of the usual; they were skipping shifts, rude, not properly dressed, the list went on. However, recently their were reports of violence, bar fights, and unprovoked attacks against other crewmembers and civilians instead. Walking over she ordered them out of the bar. They had stared at her and laughed, demanding to know who she thought she was. She had responded that she was Lieutenant Commander Susan Ivanova and that they better follow her or they would be court marshaled. She knew that they would either obey or attack. So she was ready when they stood, their leader lifting her small frame of only a hundred pounds off the ground and holding her by the front of her chest above his head sneering at her. She took a deep breath and kicked him hard in the stomach . He dropped her and doubled over in pain. Two came at her and she knocked them out with a chair. By now the entire bar was watching. Several others went for her and she took them all out. She herself sustained injuries but ignored them leading them to Med lab. Once there she ordered them to report to Maintenance 16 at 0530. At first they had been difficult to deal with, doubting they could fly. The had taken out their frustrations on her. But she took it good naturedly, trying to turn their lives around.  
  
Two and a half years later, she had succeeded. They were good pilots whom she was turning into a squadrand. They were excellent members of the crew. The received glowing reports. They made friends, had girlfriends. But they never forgot it was she who had saved them. Although they were all 15 years older than her, they regarded her as a mother figure. When she walked in cheerfully, they were all pleased because they wanted her to be happy. They teased her about having a boyfriend to which she only smiled and called them to positions to start the day.  
  
***** As usual Commander Susan Ivanova was on duty before the 0800 rush. As senior officers, she, John, Michael, and Stephen did not run shifts; they simply did what had to be done. The traffic rush had always begun at 0800. When she walked on that day she was actually happy. The night shift, which was about to be relieved, was particularly afraid of her. In the past she demanded reports the second she walked in, looking over shoulders and muttering to herself. She always had shadows under her eyes. Face set in weariness. She had actually broken Hanson's nose when he questioned an order to bring the shields up to 99%. She wasn't mean. She was just short tempered. And determined to see this through. They knew she cared about them and cared about her as well. They saw her walk in smiling, with loose hair and red nail polish and lipstick. Her determination was the same, but something was different. She spoke to several of them as she used to before the wars started. These days she gave only orders, and they were all delighted in the change. When Alpha shift started, they too noticed her good mood with pleasure nearly immediately. ********** John walked through the corridors to CnC from the briefing room where he had been all morning since eight o'clock. He himself celebrated Christmas with great pleasure and had been pleased with the decorations. However, he noticed the crew had yet to get in to the spirit. Since he had come aboard a year ago followed by the war within a month, he had yet to see any joy radiating from the crew. Overall, crew moral was very low. He considered talking to Susan about it; the crew respected her, and she seemed to have a close relationship with them. But she was as low as them, and he had noticed she was looking quite ill for some time now. He had been so caught up with the baby he had ignored a lot. He was glad Marcus was organizing this party. It would be good for them all. As he walked through the halls he was pleased to see that everyone was looking happier. Alpha shift was on lunch break and they all talked excitedly. He saw a group of ten, large men from Maintenance. Although he had never known them to be trouble he didn't like their kind. He had never seen them laughing with joy. He heard one say, "That 's great, wasn't it? I mean with the Commander." Susan, he thought leaning in, " I haven't seen her so happy in a long time." John looked around the mess. Everyone seemed to be talking about the holidays. And they all seemed to be inspired by the good mood Susan was supposedly in. Those who hadn't seen her had heard and were brightened. John decided to go to CnC himself. He walked on to the deck and was greeted by one extremely happy command crew. He searching for Susan, rather obviously, and a crewman pointed to her in the 'pit'. She was smiling as she looked over some data Corwin presented, and they were going over it. She turned towards him and he saw that she was wearing bright red lipstick and her hair was loose. A bit of color was in her usually pale cheeks. She saw him and motioned him down with her hands and he saw that they were painted the same shade as her lips. He looked at her and realized what a beautiful woman she was. Oh he had known it since they had first met, but this somehow reconfirmed it. He smiled and walked down, she stopped talking to look up at him and said, "Hey Sailor." He grinned, it had been a long time since she had used her nickname for him. " Hey Ninja girl," he responded, wondering what was going on. " Hey come on lets go to lunch." John said. They used to do that often. But since the last few months he had yet to see her off duty even for lunch in the middle of the day. He missed that . She was like a sister to him. Twenty years his junior he felt like looking out for her. Usually she refused but today she smiled and accepted He held out his hand to her and felt her slip her small one into his large one. He instantly felt the difference between the two. Hers was blistered and cut, especially on the palm side, but today she had attempted to hide the scars with cream and lotion. His were tanner than her ivory colored ones and much better cared for as his job called mostly for paper work and not the type of physical labor she did daily. He spoke the entire time with her responding. Afterwards, she left and he wandered the halls a bit running into Marcus. Marcus looked as though he had trimmed his beard shined his belt, pin and shoes. There was an undeniable change in him. His eyes lit up with joy. John wondered if she had finally accepted his love and returned it. It certainly existed. Well he would wait for it to play it self out. 


	6. Chapter Six: No!

Disclaimer: same as always  
  
  
  
Holiday Lights Chapter 6: No!  
  
  
  
That night, Susan and Marcus met to began preparations. She showed him the menorah and told him the story of the Macabees. He listened eagerly to her voice. With this going on there were also preparations for the battle which was coming. The spare time they had was limited but one day Marcus asked Stephen out to lunch in the Zocolo . He was going to ask for advice for a Holiday gift for Susan. Stephen met him at a popular restaurant immediately knowing it was about Susan. "So is it true you two are an item?" he asked with a glint in his eye. " How do you know?" Marcus asked astonished. "It is a small station, besides there hasn't been anyone coming in due to being beat up" was the response he received. Knowing he was getting no help until he explained, Marcus said, "We've admitted our feelings, but we are taking it slowly. I need your help for a Christmas present for her." The two talked quietly for some time when Stephen suggested something. Marcus grinned and thanked him for his help. The party was coming together nicely and the day for the attack came. Usually they very careful of hiding their relationship, however, that day Marcus quietly slipped into her quarters at 4 am. They were all meeting at 5 before heading out at 6 to meet the darkness. After, dressing and leaving orders for during there absence, Susan to the command and maintenance crews as well as the pilots who would stay behind, and Marcus the Rangers and contacts, they sat holding hands on the sofa silently till it was time to leave. When they walked in to the War Room still holding hands no one commented even though everyone saw. Delenn bid them all farewell as John, Susan, Michael , and Marcus headed towards White Star 19 which would be the flagship for the battle ahead. They reached the place where they waited for the Shadows and didn't have to wait long. From a single point they came, dark figures of evil. John barked orders and Susan played with strategy all doing everything they could. The battle was not going well. Blood of comrades filled the space. They were losing fighters. The ship was taking heavy damage. Susan jumped up, " There is one fighter left , I'm taking it." Marcus protested," No!" he knew her chances out there were slim. Susan already on her way out said," I have to do this. the light cannot fail" John turned to her and said " Godspeed." she nodded once and headed to the shuttle bay and with in minutes she had launched, continuing to command her fighters. Susan alone gathered them and lead them in the final assault which won them the battle. John called down battle mode, his joy in his voice, " Sheridan to Ivanova," he called over the link," Susan you did it!" he waited for a response but none came. Marcus leaning forward with anxiety and worry in his eyes tried," Cole to Ivanova." again static. Lennier said," Captain, Marcus, I think you should see this." Lennier turned on the screen and said ,"This is Commander Ivanova's fighter," as it was displayed. The fighter was drifting with a thruster shot off. The front was crushed. In several places the fighter was dented in severally. Another thruster was rammed and crushed. No one could have survived that crash. The deck of White Star fell silent, even the Mimbari mourning the death of Mineera Ivanova, whom they had all come to respect and honor as the greatest warrior. John stood up gaping in horror and turned as Marcus's scream shattered the silence," Susan! No!" 


	7. Chapter Seven

Disclaimer: Do I have to do this all the time? Everything but the plot belongs to JMS. The plot is mine.  
  
  
  
Holiday lights Chapter 7   
  
Marcus raced to the shuttle bay where Susan's fighter was being docked. John raced after him but was unable to keep up. They reached the shuttle bay and her fighter looked even worse. Marcus raced to where the Mimbari were trying to free her by cutting away the fighter with laser. It seemed like an eternity before they motioned to him. Marcus rushed forward and cried out in horror when he saw her. A large sharp pole had sliced her belly deeply and lay there stuck, her legs were burned heavily, her arms were broken and her face was covered in bruises. This was immediately noticed. John looked at her and saw she was conscious but in too much pain to respond. He couldn't believe it. "Marcus," he intoned to let her know. When Marcus saw she was awake he cried out again. She tried to speak but couldn't. Tears fell from Marcus's eyes as he soothed her. She relaxed under his touch. She tried to say something again but her cough was back this time forcing up blood. A nurse came up and spoke in Mimbari to Marcus after looking at Susan who lay in Marcus's arms. John looked at him questioningly. " We have to keep her awake and not move her. He also said that it would be best to get her to Babylon 5 as soon as possible or she won't live." John nodded and watched as Marcus talked to Susan keeping her awake. She kept coughing and it looked as if she was going to lose consciousness. "Come on Susan," John tried," taking her blood soaked hand," You have to fight, for Marcus for the baby , you have to see him." He pleaded. The trip back seemed to be longer than ever. John gave the Rangers their after battle order and along with White Stars 3 and 7 and the fighters headed back to base. Susan's condition was not good. She lay in Marcus's arms as there was nothing the Mimbari could do for her. He pleaded with her to live and John watched the two somehow knowing their love was the purest love there ever had been and ever could be. She nodded ever so slightly but her eyes kept closing due to the bloodloss. She kept coughing and between that, her stomach wound, and other injuries, Marcus was covered in her blood. He held her talking soothingly to her. It got worse. Several times during the trip she fell closer to death's door. John brought water and the broth one of the crew had made especially for her. She was so weak she couldn't keep her eyes open. John helped Marcus ease some liquid into her, but it just dribbled down her chin. John could feel the pain Marcus must be going through; he remembered how it felt when Delenn was stabbed by Nightwatch. Besides, Susan was like a little sister to him, and he grieved as any brother would. He looked carefully. She was extremely weak due to lack of care towards herself but Marcus seemed to know this. The blood just gushed out and they couldn't stop it. A pile of soaked rags lay near them as did supplies to attempt to stop the flow now. Susan opened her eyes and locked them with Marcus's. He smiled and whispered, "I love you."  
  
John craned to hear Susan's reply, "I love you too," before losing consciousness as her eyes closed and went limp in Marcus's arms. 


	8. Chapter Eight: At Her Side

Disclaimer: NOT mine, but if they were, they would have had the happy endings I try to give them through fanfiction  
  
Authors note: I am aware that Susan is at least 30, but this is my story so I am improvising. I am planning to write a story that explains my reasoning.Thanks however for keeping me informed. Please continue to read and review.  
  
  
  
  
  
Holiday Lights Chapter 8: At her side   
  
As soon as they docked, Marcus rose with Susan's form and carried her out effortlessly to where the med team, along with Stephen, was waiting. Marcus followed them; no one dared to stop him. John wanted to follow as well but went to his quarters where Delenn waited for him, to shower and clean Susan's blood off of him. He quickly redressed and after checking up on CnC, along with Delenn rushed to Medlab one to hoping that his best friend was still alive.   
  
They struggled for hours to bring her back and nearly lost her several times in the process. Finally, hours later, Stephen appeared to where Marcus, Michael, John, and Delenn waited for news. "If she makes it through the night, she has a fifty-fifty chance." was all he said, not trusting his voice. He wiped his tear stained cheeks and continued, "We did surgery for the stomach wound. Her organs were torn and we had to do the best we could. She has lost a great deal of blood. Her leg burns are also severe and if she makes it I am not sure if she will walk." Marcus walked into the small room in which she lay alone. She wore a medlab gown that was sea green. Her hair lay loose over her shoulders. A tube oxygen lay on her upper lip keeping her alive. Her comlink had been removed and in its place were three needles that lead to IV's. One IV contained blood, the other nourishment and the third antibodies to help her through the long road ahead. Marcus took her hand and began talking until he fell asleep still at her side. 


	9. Chapter Nine: Darkness

Disclaimer: All belongs to JMS except the plot.  
  
  
  
Holiday Lights Chapter 9: Darkness  
  
It was one of the longest nights the station knew. The night they waited to see if Commander Susan Ivanova would live to see the next day. At her side Marcus sat, trying to stay awake but the long day caused him to sleep his pike in hand ready to defend her. Her pike, pen knife, jewelry, belt wallet, and wrist light had been preserved, but the rest of her uniform was unsalvageable. Delenn went to bed, but John, Michael, and Stephen held their silent vigil outside her room, watching Marcus's one inside. John was surprised how much the crew cared about her. Everyone who could came. Everyone prayed. Nearly all five thousand of the crew. As morning came, everyone waited for Stephen to examine her. He quietly said she had made it through the night but had slipped into a coma. Through out the next few days her condition remained unchanged. Marcus spent several hours reading to her, speaking to her. He left only when necessary and returned as soon as possible. Her room was filled with cards and flowers from the crew to the woman who did everything she could for them. Hanukkah began. Marcus, remembering about the menorah, brought her large silver one from her quarters and lit the candles every night, allowing them to burn until they went out. Each day he replaced the burned out ones and at dusk lit them again. On the eighth night, as he held her hand as usual, he waited for the candles that were almost out. Suddenly he felt her squeeze his hand and looked up into her eyes as she whispered his name, "Marcus," and the lights went out, leaving them in darkness. 


	10. Chapter Ten: Realization

Disclaimer: You know the drill; none of this is mine.  
  
  
  
Holiday lights Chapter 10: Realization  
  
  
  
In a voice that was barely above a whisper, Marcus called, "Lights," and the computer obliged so that he was able to see the face of his love. She was pale but smiled at him and he whispered, "Susan?" she nodded and he held his finger up to say he would be right back as he ran out and returned a moment later dragging in Stephen who laughed. He knelt by Susan, asking how she felt; she shrugged. "Fine when do I get out of here?" Stephen slipped his hand up her gown to check her wound, and she nearly cried out. Both Marcus and Stephen noticed as Stephen called for pain killers to be brought and gently injected his almost little sister and best friend. Michael, Susan, and Stephen were best friends . They were like siblings and John was one of them now. They all saw Susan as a little sister that they did their best to protect. He now held up her skeletal frame and allowed Marcus to take her as they helped her sip water. The road ahead was long and difficult. It took days for her injuries to heal. In the mean time, everyone who could visited her, and her room was filled with flowers. One day, John went to see her. When he was at the door, which was cracked open, he heard Corwin inside. Lieutenant David Corwin was a young man around 30, 32 who was Susan's second. He ran Command when she was not there. He sat at her side holding her hand and John peered deeply to see what was going on. Corwin had brought some flowers that he had lain in her lap. He was talking to her and telling her about certain crew members, the station's situation, and the war as it was at the moment. Corwin got up and said, "Get well soon Commander; we all miss you." She smiled at him as he stood and waited at attention. She looked at him not understanding till Corwin cleared his throat and she smiled and whispered in her loudest voice at the moment, "Dismissed," as he saluted with a crisp, "yes ma'am." As John entered a group of about ten came in also to see her. They were the Maintenance workers he had seen the other day. Their leader carried flowers and they all had and two cards. One was extremely large and the other regular size. John was expecting trouble and frankly did not know why Susan would have such visitors. When John told them to go ahead one of them replied with politeness he hadn't expected that they could all go in together. Stephen had asked that her visitors go in a few at a time and John mentioned this. They told him that they had cleared their large group with the chief medical officer. John didn't know what was going on but guessed that these men were important to her and that was why it had been cleared. John wondered what it was that clearly everyone in Medlab knew that he didn't. They walked in together, and Susan smiled as John watched in amazement as every one of them snapped to attention with respect for this tiny woman lying wearied in front of them. She called them to ease. Then they handed her the flowers and small card from them. Next they showed her the large card that was held up by two people. It had been signed by the entire crew. All five thousand of them. John wondered why he hadn't been asked to sign and resolved to find out. She thanked them and each one stepped up giving her a peck on the cheek, before leaving respectfully. John walked over to her and sat down in the seat, asking how she was. Her response was weak as John began to talk of their baby, which seemed to catch her attention. He talked for quite a while. John left as well. As he reached the door, Michael walked in with a covered bowl and spoon, and kissed her on the cheek. She protested, but he refused to listen, saying, "I went through all this trouble to make this; the least you can do is eat it," as he opened the bowl and, sitting beside her, began to feed her tomato soup. John left seeking out Stephen who seemed to be expecting him. "The card?" asked Stephen knowing what John wanted to know. He nodded. Stephen began, "You have to realize what Susan means to the crew. They approached me for help and I gave it. John, you have to realize how many people here have been trained by Susan. As you know Earth Force did not have much faith in Babylon 5 so they gave her a crew of old rough untrained workers. A drop out for a security chief was approved, a warrior for a diplomat and a person younger than 90% of the crew at then 24 for second in command. But Susan trained them, the men were poor Maintenance workers from broken homes, without any hope. She turned them into pilots. There are Engineers who couldn't do a thing who have been trained by her. She may have a short temper but she will help any one who needs it. The lower decks personnel, when they aren't sure what to do and panicked for fear of punishment she doesn't write them excuses she helps them with the problem and teaches them. She was the factor in uniting this crew. She helps me when she can here, allowing the nurses and other doctors to instruct her as they would any petty officer. She makes them feel as if the are something special. They don't forget something like that. She works nearly 3 shifts a day, and everyone knows it. The reason you weren't asked to sign is because the crew feels you don't appreciate her." John felt realization sweeping across him, "I never knew." "Well now you do; that woman is the most loved and respected person on this station and we have decided it's time she knew." 


	11. Chapter Eleven: Hope

Disclaimer: Same as always  
  
  
  
Holiday Lights Chapter 11: Hope  
  
  
  
Slowly Susan learned to walk again. It was painful; her legs had been badly burned. She had lost a lot of blood and due her lack of concern for herself she hadn't been in excellent condition to began with making her recovery more difficult. Marcus spent hours daily helping her with exercises that she had to do. Finally on New Year's Day Stephen decided she would have to learn to walk. With Marcus holding her on one side and Stephen on the other she took three painful steps before she collapsed in Marcus's arms. The next day she was able to walk further, and the next day, further. Till January 9th when she was able to walk short distances. On that day in the medlab, hope was born in the form of a future for the Army of Light. That future was David Jeffery Sheridan. Susan smiled as they heard him cry and struggle to breathe his first breath. She stood up slowly as everyone was cooing at him and walked out slowly to meet her godson. Stephen smiled when he saw she had walked by herself and after allowing them a moment told her to go back to bed. He also promised that she could be released the next day, which caused her great pleasure. She held the child and silently slipped something into the folds of the cloth in which he lay. Finally she handed him back to John with congratulations and was ushered into the room where she had been since the incident. That night as Delenn prepared her child for bed, she gasped as a 1000 credit slit fell from the cloth. John came in and smiled, knowing it was from Susan. Delenn said, "We must return it." "No, it is Russian custom to give a newborn money in this way. And she would be offended if we returned it." For Hope's future. 


	12. Chapter Twelve: Nothing is purer than th...

Disclaimer: None of this is mine   
  
  
  
Holiday Lights Chapter 12: "There is nothing purer than the love we share"  
  
  
  
The week after, Susan was cleared for duty even though she was weak and had trouble walking. To celebrate, Marcus arranged the party that had been missed due to Susan's accident. So on the 16th of January, the group, which had planned to hold the same party on the 24th of the last month, met on the way to Marcus's quarters, with the exception of Susan whom none of them had seen since she had been cleared to return to work the next day that morning. Stephen said, "I hope she didn't bail." "He loves her. It would kill him." They rang the bell and the door was answered by a grinning Marcus in a black suit. He didn't seem to notice that Susan was not there. They were ushered in, and on the sofa sat Susan. She was wearing a Russian dress. A white floor length skirt that showed only the last centimeter of her 3 inch heels. The shirt was red. It was full sleeved and went down to her mid thigh. Her hair was up in an interesting twist that made her look like royalty. She wore a Ruby and gold set. The necklace, a choker, showed through the see-through red scarf she wore wrapped around her neck. Susan smiled, rose, and, walking stiffly but steadily over to them, took David with whom she had seemed to have formed a bond. The evening went as expected: dinner and gifts until the last one was exchanged. After that Marcus went over to where Susan sat holding David and to everyone's surprise knelt and asked, "Susan. Will you marry me?" They were even more surprised at her clear answer, which came without hesitation. "Yes," she said as Marcus slipped a pure silver band onto her left ring finger. It had a sapphire centerpiece, which matched her eyes, surrounded by white diamonds. It contained the inscription, "There is nothing purer than the love we share".   
  
  
  
  
  
Author's note: All references to Russian dress are made up. The money thing will be explained in my next story. I hope you enjoyed it. Please review. This is my first fic I have posted and, depending on the reviews, will continue. 


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